In his book Forgive and Forget (1984), theologian and author Lewis B. Smedes, wrote, 'To forgive is to set the prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you." At first this might seem like one of those aphorisms that pop up from time to time on social media posts to create feel-good or 'aha' moments.

But really, it is far deeper than that. Forgiveness is a difficult thing to do, both emotionally and psychologically. Even when you have decided intellectually to forgive someone for a hurt inflicted, it remains difficult at the level of the emotions, because we have abiding memories of whatever events or actions hurt us in the first place. It is easy to say 'I forgive' and mean it, then to find yourself, some short time later, stewing over a random memory.

Smedes rightly links this to the notion of being a captive, or prisoner, to the our initial unforgiveness and the  subsequent struggle with letting go for good. Once you see yourself as a prisoner of your own thoughts and feelings, the task of forgiving and forgetting becomes a doubly urgent matter. No only is it right to forgive but is it is good for us too, unfettering us from a world of unhealthy emotions and pointless, repetitive cognitions.

The quotation in the opening paragraph, or a slight variant of it, is often attributed to Corrie Ten Boom. I could find no actual written connection in her books with the statement, though I am sure she would agree wholeheartedly with it. After all, she had to forgive a former prison guard at the camp where she was interned in WW2, one who was particularly cruel to her sister.

Hard to do, but as the Lord noted, most necessary.