saying goodbye

So I'll say goodbye to you
my love
I'll say goodbye to you,
You've been my love
these 14 years
and Ill say good bye
to you.

Last night my marriage ended. As a result of my stupidity, my darling love of 14 years, my beautiful Nadia, is leaving me. My foolishness, shortsightedness and lack of self-awareness have brought this to bear. I have lost close friends, my choir, my life. I am in disgrace.

And worse yet, my little boy Tom has a split existence between this lovely home I sit in now, and the shabby little box around the corner.

Why have I thrown such a beautiful life away for idle foolishness, for idiotic pranking? What's wrong with me?

I don't know, but my heart is aching and there is nothing I can do about it.